Sunday, May 15, 2011

We made it to Philadelphia yesterday (Sat) and Axel will be having surgery tomorrow. I just don't know what to think. I love this boy so much and I really don't want him to be in any pain. I know the doctors and staff will take wonderful care of him but I just don't like the thought of him going to surgery.

I have had a nice long talk with Axel and I have told him that we are only doing this so he can live a nice long happy life without having to worry about any neck or spine problems. I only wish he understood what I was saying.

This little boy has entered my heart since the first time I saw him, and the moment we first met I knew he was perfect for us.In fact, he is sitting on my lap as I write this, Axel will look at me and say "I love you" then give me a kiss on my cheek. How wonderful is that. And think he has only been with us for 6 months.  He has fit in soooo well.

What I guess I'm asking for is prayers, my emotions are going everywhere. I know God will watch over Axel and he will soothe my heart.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Love at first sight.

God has brought my son and wife home to me. I just can't tell you how happy I am!

I want to start by saying that the first moment my eyes met Axels eyes, I knew it was LOVE that I had received from God.

Just the look on Axels face when he saw me, made my heart melt. I could tell that he couldn't believe that I was real, and I couldn't believe he was real. It was like Axel and I had this bond right from the get go, Axel came up and gave me a kiss on the cheek and a big hug, and I knew he was my little boy. The last time I had those deep loving feelings was when my son Aaron was born.

I have always wanted to have those feelings again, I just never met the right woman until Leah came along and we made it happen. The feelings a father gets from the first moment he lay eyes on their newborn is not any different than seeing your adopted child for the first time. The love flows through every part of your body, your heart skips a beat and then tears fill your eyes. It is a fabulous feeling!

I feel so blessed to have received a gift like this from God. I just wish that there was more fathers out there that wanted to have these feelings again and would really think about adopting a child. There are soooo many children in this world that just want the love from a Mom and Dad that are in institutions  and orphanages. These children don't care if you don't have alot of money or a big house or a fancy car.The only thing these precious children want is LOVE. Love from a Mom and Dad, a sister, or brother, or both, they don't care about material things.

If there is any men reading this and want this loving feeling, please write and I can help you and your wife get started with the right organization located right here in America.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Patiently Waiting!

I know the Leah and Axel will soon be home, yeah! What I really wish for, is for them to get on a plane TOMORROW, and just have them put their feet on American soil.
 God could not have blessed us any more than He has. He is wonderful! What we still need, is prayers for  Leah and Axel!!!!   I am the type of person to sit back,watch, listen, then figure a game plan. Well, I have  sat back and analyzed everything I have heard from Leah, and all I know is, I'm thankful for Leah's resourcefulness and the abilities to find friends who live in Serbia and who have helped her out tremendously these last few days. I give Leah tons of credit for holding it together and doing what she is doing.
Have you ever hung up the phone and wished that your conversation had never ended? It's like that every evening for me. I can't wait until I can hold my wife in my arms. Then of course my new son, Axel.


Thursday, December 9, 2010

Thank You Lord

It all started when my beautiful wife started showing me pictures of children she had met while in the orphanage in Eastern Europe. I really started looking at these children in a different light and I could see that there was love in each and everyone of the pictures I looked at. I, so, fell in love with them all. I knew that it was time for me to pray, and ask God what I/we should do, and if everything would work out for us if we were to bring some of these children home to love and take care of.

The answer I received entered my heart as soon as my last words to Him came out of my mouth. They were "Everything is going to work out" I had such a warm feeling and my whole body tingled with a new kind of love I have never felt before. I, at that moment, knew what was ahead of us. A new love for some of Gods innocent children.

So today is the start of some of Gods work. I am now the proud Papa of Axel!!! I only wish I could have been with Leah so we could share our tears of joy together. Don't get me wrong,we still cried together, only it was over the phone, it is not the same. I really wanted to hold Leah and Axel and just praise Jesus  for giving us the gift of one of his children.

I am now asking God to not stop here. There is a special little girl in Eastern Europe who has entered my heart and mind and I know in my heart that she will be Daddys little girl real soon.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Where is the Love?

While I was chatting with Leah tonight she told me of a heart wrenching thing that happened to her and my son Axel today.
The two of them went for a walk in town today and Leah noticed 4 or 5 well dressed boys,eating burgers (or what ever they put in their hamburgers), walking towards them, Leah could tell they were talking about Axel because she could see they looking at him. When the boys got next to them, one of the boys spat at Axel, right in front of Leah. She said Axel looked up at her like,what did I do for that boy to do that to me. When Leah told me this, I was heart broken.

What the heck is wrong with people? I know that in this particular country they consider any children with disabilities disposable, but come on, I mean, why can't they see that these children are loving, giving, kind and would not hurt anyone. Just because some of these children don't look "normal" doesn't mean they don't have feelings, look at my little girl Angela, we could just be sitting together watching t.v. and she will look up at me and say "Dean, I Love You". Do you think there is some feelings there? How can people treat these sweet precious children so poorly?

What would you do, being in a foreign country not knowing their language, if this happened to you and your child?  

Saturday, December 4, 2010

How Tough Can It Be?

Alright, I was Mister Mom when Leah was gone in March and April and never had Angela late for school. Now, I get her up a half hour earlier then Leah (every day) and I have only gotten her to school on time ONCE this week. I don't understand!!  She is not stalling out on me, she is listening to me and doing everything very promptly. I am brushing her hair while she eats so two things are getting done at the same time. I lay everything out in advance so I don't forget anything, clothes, meds,that breathing thing, coat, gloves, hat, boots. I am organized. (okay I forgot to send her shoes 1 day).

So, should I get her up earlier or will I get faster at this as time goes by?

Friday, December 3, 2010

Meeting our Son.

Okay, it wasn't the perfect way to meet my son but with technology today and with the job situation, it was the next best thing.

First of all I woke up real early and wanted to get online ASAP to meet Axel, then I thought, oh, I don't want him to meet me with morning bed head, in my robe, not shaven, you know that wonderful morning look, so I made myself presentable, brushed my hair,and made myself look good. The moment had now arrived for me to get online and say hello. I did and I was the happiest man in the world at that moment. All I could say was, Hello Axel, I am your PaPa over and over. I was really hoping he could understand just for that moment ,english, I knew he couldn't, but I know he knows PaPa, (I think that means Grandpa in his language) that's okay he can still call me PaPa, that's what I want.

After talking with Leah we are going to have some challenges ahead of us. That's okay,we have had many challenges in front of us before and have conquered them all. I just really wish I was with Leah so I could help her out and not have to be challenged on her own. At least I'll have Leah here for me when that happens.It's always team work with Leah and I and I feel like I'm letting her down with me at home.
I will just keep praying for Leah and Axel and know that things will be better.
Still the happiest Dad in the world.